Dirty Like Brody
by Jaine Diamond
Self-Published
Book 2 in the Dirty Series
She was all he ever wanted, even when she broke his heart…
Growly and gorgeous band manager Brody Mason has been aching for his friend’s little sister, Jessa Mayes, since they were just kids.
By the time they’d grown up, she’d broken his heart.
Then she ripped it right the f*ck out.
As it turns out, time doesn’t heal that kind of wound.
It leaves a gaping, festering hole.
Hence Brody’s sunshiny nature.
Meanwhile, Jessa appears to be living the dream—blessed with beauty, talent, and a glamorous life.
But she also has a secret.
Six years ago, she ran away from her dream career as a songwriter with her brother’s band. She also ran away from Brody, the only man she’s ever loved.
And she never told anyone why.
Now Jessa’s doing the one thing she swore she’d never do.
She’s coming home.
As a bridesmaid in her brother’s rock star wedding, she’ll come face-to-face with the mistakes of her past.
Including the sexy, surly, heartbroken one.
It definitely won’t be easy.
Love this intense never is.
Genre:
Rockstar Romance
Dirty Like Brody by Jaine Diamond is the second book in the Dirty series. It centers around Dirty manager Brody Mason, and Jessa Mayes, Jesse's little sister, who moved away from home years ago, stopped writing music for Dirty, and became a lingerie model. Brody and Jessa have pined over each other for years. He waited for her, only for her to break his heart, and run away, leaving her brother and her dream job writing music for Dirty behind, and never telling anyone why. Six years later, Jessa is breaking her promise to herself to never come back home, to attend her brother's wedding to Katie. Seeing Brody again after all these years will be agonizing - but even she doesn't realize just how hard Brody will make it.
I fucking hated this. Okay. Okay, correction - I hated some of these. Mainly, Brody. If you are a regular reader here, you KNOW I love a good grump/sunshine relationship. You would think I would be all over the broody Brody. But nope. He didn't come off as a silent, brooding type, just an angry, bitter, and mean guy. There were some sweet moments, and I won't deny the sex was hot, but I was left just unhappy at the end. I didn't like Brody, and Jessa's reasoning for running away and pushing everyone away - including her brother - was frankly ... dumb. Without spoiling things for anyone who hasn't read this yet, I couldn't think of ANY reason Jessa came to the conclusion she did, in regards to how everyone, especially Brody, would see her. Nope. Just, nope. And the truth to why Jessa left didn't even come out until 85% INTO THE STORY! This book dragged on WAY too long. I was looking for spoilers on what happened, so I could skip ahead, and all I found was a bunch of other readers who were left underwhelmed. Which is exactly how this book left me - underwhelmed.
I won't lie ... if it wasn't for my curiosity in Zane and Maggie's story, I might have given up after this one. It's boring, Brody is too angry, and Jessa is too angsty. And nothing made sense. Ugh. But hey, at least the sex was written good!
Brody: “A princess, huh?”
Jessa: “The princess.”
Brody: “So who’s the prince, then?”
Jessa: “Don’t need one.”
He looked at me.
Brody: “Then who’s gonna save you if you fall in the quicksand?”
Jessa: “I will.”
Brody: “What if you can’t?”
Jessa: “Then you can. If you want to. But you might get stuck in there, too.”
He stared at me for a minute. Then he smiled, slowly, and it was like the sun coming out from behind the clouds.
Brody: “Then I guess we’ll sink together.” Devi: “You,”
Devi said, pointing her finger at Katie’s niece, Sadie,
Devi: “get one drink from the nice bartender man, and then you’re going to bed.”
Sadie: “Why?”
Sadie whined.
Roni: “Because, after that your mommy and aunt Katie and aunt Devi are gonna talk about penises, and they don’t want you to hear it.”
Sadie: “Yucky!”
Sadie cried.
Jessa: “Roni,”
I warned her.
Roni: “What?”
Roni shrugged.
Roni:: “She’s like ten. She knows what a penis is.”
Becca: “She’s seven, and yes, she does.”
Sadie: “Why are you talking about penises?”
Sadie asked her mom, horrified.
Becca: “Because sometimes,”
Becca said, handing her daughter a virgin cocktail,
Becca: “that’s what mommies do.” My memories of Brody, good or bad, were mine. They were all I had, but at least they would always be mine; even if I had nothing else. Memories, and a T-shirt. My big brother, Jesse Mayes, married Katie Bloom just after five o’clock on a clear winter evening in front of their dearest friends and family. He didn’t ditch her at the altar. She didn’t throw up. Zane: “Shit, brother.”
Jesse stopped playing as Zane walked in, a big grin on his face to match my own.
Zane: “Is it okay that shit gave me a boner?”
Jesse: “Since when do you care if anyone’s okay with your dick being up?”
my brother said, throwing him a look.
Jesse: “And if it is, don’t sit next to my sister.” Jessa: “I don’t really write full songs anymore. Other than when Jesse held me in a room at gunpoint and ordered me to write them for his solo album.”
Zane: “Right,”
Zane said, his expression thoughtful.
Zane: “Same thing he did to get Katie to marry him, I guess.”
Yeah. Childish burns like that… all day long. My brother just threw a drum stick at him. Brody: “I have about two hundred thousand memories of you like that, and I loved you in every single one of them.” Jessa: “Standing up there on stage with a guitar, while Zane sings my words… it makes me feel… naked.”
For some reason, that pissed him off. A lot. He sucked in an agitated breath.
Brody: “You modeled practically naked. “What’s the fucking difference?”
Jessa: “The difference is that was my body. You’re asking me to bare my soul.” Jessa: "Don’t you fucking walk out on me!”
He stopped dead and turned back to me. We’d both stopped dead in the wake of my voice, pretty much screaming those words at him. I couldn’t help it. I just snapped. How dare he walk out on me when all he did was punish me for leaving, over and over again?
Jessa: “It was always you I wanted. Don’t you think that if I could go back to that first time you kissed me outside that party when I was fifteen and do everything from that moment on differently, I would? But I can’t! I can’t change the past, Brody. You’ll never know how much I wish I could, but I can’t. All I can do is stand here in front of you right now and ask you to see me, me, and not that girl who ran away! I’m. Right. Here.”
By this point, I was really losing it, so I just let it all come gushing out. Because maybe this was my last chance? How many times was he going to walk away from me, or let me walk away from him, before he really was done with me?
Jessa: “A world where I don’t have you in my life… I lived that way for the last six-and-a-half years, and these last couple of weeks have just proven to me that I don’t ever want to do that again! I can’t! To be honest, I have no idea how I did it for so long and kept on living!” Jessa: “Tell me you’re not done with me.”
And I did not just mean now. I did not just mean sex. He knew that, right? He hauled me up against him and delved his hands into my hair, kissing my face with dazed, sex-drunk kisses as he held me close, his pupils large in the dim light.
Brody; “I will never be done with you,” Jessa: “You ever going to tell me what this one means?”
I ran my fingertips along the runes.
Jessa: “Abstinence… I mean, I know I said I wouldn’t fuck you before you told me, so I’ve kind of lost my leverage here.”
Brody: “It means self-restraint. Resisting something. Like something you’re hungry for and dependent on.”
Jessa: “Thank you, Mr. Dictionary. But that’s not what I was asking.”
Brody: “No?”
Jessa: “No. Why do you have it tattooed on your arm?”
There was a silent pause.
Brody: “Promise you won’t get upset?”
Jessa: “I make no such promise.”
Brody kissed my shoulder.
Brody: “Then I’m not telling you.”
I considered that.
Jessa: “Okay. How about I promise I won’t totally freak out and start throwing shit? But I can’t promise you how I’m going to feel when I don’t even know what you’re going to say.”
His arms tightened around me.
Brody: “It’s supposed to remind me why I should stay away from you.”
My hand stilled where I was caressing a trail back and forth along the tattoo.
Jessa: “And why should you stay away from me?”
His arms tightened even more and he said,
Brody: “Because I can’t.” Brody: “I never wanted you to go. I wanted you to stay. I just… I thought I was doing the right thing by letting you… fuck… I don’t even know anymore. It just seemed like every time I tried to fight, I just pushed you further away. And I didn’t want to lose you.”
My voice broke and I nuzzled into her hair as I held her tighter.
Brody: “I lost you anyway.”
Jessa: “You didn’t lose me, Brody. I was always yours.” Maggie: “Just shut up and listen. I’ll put her in my car and drive her to the airport myself if you wanna keep acting like a crazy deranged bear with a firecracker up its ass.” I took her chin and drew her face close to mine.
Brody: “I have loved you forever, Jessa Mayes. Pretty sure I was fucking born to love you. I know you didn’t really believe me when I said so, or maybe you just didn’t want to… but I would’ve waited for you forever.” Brody; “I’m not telling you to change your life for me, Jessa. I’m asking you to finally share it with me.”